Day at the beach

After a recent trip to St. Kilda with my wife and two girls, I’m a lot more relaxed and laid back.  No surprise there, right?  Lying out on the beach, catching a few waves, staying at a beach side hotel, and complimentary massages?  It would be pretty relaxing to anybody.  The most important thing I got from my trip though was seeing my girls laughing and playing in the waves and sand and the pure joy and innocence I saw on their faces.  I wish they could always be that way, as any parent does.  I don’t want them to experience adulthood and the troubles that it entails.  They built sand castles upon sand castles, and walked up and down the beach in search of sea shells and sand dollars, maybe a dead jellyfish here and there to poke.  They ran in the water, splashing each other and jumping when waves came.

Watching

them while my wife and I read on the beach, I couldn’t help but think back to days when I was that carefree and happy.  When did it all stop?  When did the carefree and happy attitude get replaced with the stressed, overworked father and husband?  And even before I was married, I was stressed out about getting through school and if my wife, Nicole, would say yes when I proposed.  On top of that, I worried about getting a job if I did pass college and scraping up the money to even buy an engagement ring.  Wedding and honeymoon funds, house mortgages, upkeep of a house, and diapers and kids toys were enough to cause a panic attack.  Why?  Why, at a certain point in our life do we stop having fun like we used to? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love Nicole and our two girls, Brittany and Michelle, and I wouldn’t trade them for the world, but I’m so much more stressed because of all this responsibility than I was when I was a kid. Me and my wife met at a rather surprising speed dating event in Melbourne, and I defenitely needed some pro tips on speed dating, however it all went smooth unguided, lucky for me.

Imagine it.

Summer vacations, parents buying almost everything you could possibly need and some things you might want jobs and money troubles far down the road, even the freedom of getting your license, first car even if it did bring a little bit more stress than before.  But I guess, if you really think about it, everything seems stressful and hard when it is happening then.  Looking back, high school and even college seems like a breeze.  Just Nicole and I as a married couple seems easier, even though our relationship, as any others, has not been anything close to perfect.   I guess that’s just life, but I hate that expression.  Does it have to so hard?  I still have happy moments with my family, like the trip to the beach for example, but isn’t it horrible how they seem to get farther and farther apart as we get older?  Since it does seem to get harder as we get older (until retirement maybe), I’m going to value and cherish every moment I get with my wife and Brittany and little three year old Michelle.

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